Bad, naughty Koko!

A third woman has sued the Gorilla Foundation (an organization founded for the study and preservation of gorillas) for sexual harassment. Why the lawsuits? Koko, the legendary sign-language using gorilla, wanted to see her knockers.

WOODSIDE, Calif. – A third woman has filed a lawsuit claiming a caretaker for Koko, the world-famous sign-language-speaking gorilla, pressured her to expose her breasts as a way to bond with the animal.

Iris Rivera, 39, sued the Gorilla Foundation this week in San Mateo County Superior Court, saying the foundation’s president, Francine Patterson, repeatedly told her to expose her breasts.

Rivera, an administrative assistant at the foundation until she quit last month, claims Patterson told her last year that Koko was signing that “she wants to see your nipples.”

Columnist Dan Judge penned a great column dealing with Koko’s inappropriate behavior in Sunday’s Times-Herald (Vallejo, CA).

Bi-curious Koko – Two caretakers for Koko, the world-famous sign-language speaking female gorilla, have filed a lawsuit claiming they were fired because they would not expose their breasts as a way of bonding with the simian celebrity.

The two women claim Koko’s longtime trainer Francine “Penny” Patterson insisted they indulge Koko’s “nipple fetish” or lose their jobs at the Gorilla Foundation in the South San Francisco Bay Area.

The lawsuit claims that on one occasion Patterson said, “Koko, you see my nipples all the time. You are probably bored with my nipples. You need to see new nipples.”

Wow. I feel dirty. And exactly how does a gorilla say “I am bored with your nipples” in sign language anyway?

Nevertheless, these two women should probably be thanking their lucky stars. If a 300-pound primate is going to have a cross-species sexual fetish, just be grateful it doesn’t involve a good, hard spanking.

I have to point out that, if Koko had been flashing west-coast gang signs instead of requesting some rack, these same complaintants would no doubt be touting Koko’s ability to celebrate diversity.

15 comments

  1. Fuck man, every time I try to get a girl to show me her tits, I get smacked – but a monkey gets all the play he wants? Give me a break. And those women are stupid to have done it. I mean, they could have shown ME their tits!

  2. and it appears as if my attempt at humor was undermined due to the inability to recognize a del tag. In any case, yay for boobs.

    As a self-professed leg-butt man, though, I’ve recently been noticing a lot of boobs. And not just becuase my ex OCDs came back to California.

    (OCDs = Orange County D’s)

    Jihad Jimmy

  3. What a great scam! You can pet my pet rabbit, Mr. Sniffles, but he just told me that we -um- he needs to see your breasts. It is important for fuzzy wittle Mr. Sniffles so he can be relaxed around you and let you pet him.

  4. Hector, your similarity to an animal never ceases to amaze me, and here I see it even verified.

    PTH- I was going to say that I think maybe these women need to get different jobs. They could at least successfully sue for sexual harrassment.

  5. Well, a liger is pretty much my favorite animal…. 😀

    And, just for the record, I am really pleased with the stud in my own stall, thank you very much.

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