WARNING: Post contains excessive Fisking. Apologies in advance.

NO SIR! That’s what area anti-smoking nazi Douglas Benton wants you to hear when you ask if you can smoke in Blount County (TN) restaurants.

Allow me to preface this by stating that I don’t smoke, never have, never will. HOWEVER, there is a lynch-mob mentality of anti-smoking nanny-staters who are hellbent on legislating the elimination of smoking (I’ve even heard of cases where people were sued for smoking in their own homes!), and they nauseate me to no end.

In Benton’s case, he and his group are trying to force private businesses to eliminate smoking so that they may eat their buffet mac-and-cheese in a smoke-free environment. Continue on…

ALCOA – Douglas Benton is ready to clear the air about smoking in restaurants.

Count him firmly in opposition to it.

Whew! That’s a load off. I was wondering what he might be thinking this morning!

The plan is to ask Blount restaurants to voluntarily ban smoking but to target those that decline for action in the form of organized boycotts, picketing and what Benton calls “breathe-ins.”

“It’s pretty absurd what we have to breathe in restaurants,” Benton said.

No, you don’t HAVE to breathe anything in restaurants – if you don’t like it, DON’T GO. The owners of a private establishment don’t owe you a damn thing. For the time being, we live in a free market economy where the owners of such establishments have the right to allow smoking in their restaurants if they so choose. If you don’t like it – GO SOMEWHERE ELSE. Or is that too difficult a concept?

Benton’s wife, he said, has asthma, and he also wants to prevent his children, a 5-year-old and 2 1/2-year-old twins, from having to inhale clouds of secondhand smoke when they go out to eat, a favorite leisure-time activity for the family.

OH, I see… It’s for the children. Then by all means, let’s pass a law!

“Everyone is in agreement on this except the restaurants,” he said, noting that the vast majority of those who have expressed an opinion to him on the subject support the ban.

There was almost a glimmer of actual thought there, but it must have passed pretty quickly.

Since Mr. Benton has been unable to achieve his goals through the courts, he’s organizing something called a “breathe-in”. That’s kind of like the die-ins you see out in Berkeley except they’re sitting upright.

The breathe-in is the most extreme of the alternatives No S.I.R. may undertake.

Benton described it as an orchestrated, peaceful occupation of a restaurant by paying customers who sit at as many tables as possible, purchase not much more than a cup of coffee, possibly put on white surgical masks and try to, in Benton’s words, “influence restaurants to change their minds financially.”

So far, Benton said, he has told three Blount restaurants of his plan, which he says he intends to initiate “kind of soon.”

I recommend that Blount County restaurants pass photos of these clowns around then charge them a sitting fee. That will slow down the breathe-ins pretty quickly – whenever they start – which should be “kind of soon.”

The concepts here are all so very basic, perhaps they’re out of the reach of these simpletons. If you don’t like the atmosphere of a restaurant -whether it’s music, smoking, topless dancers, sports memorabilia, whatever – simply go somewhere else. Private business owners owe you JACK SQUAT. Patronize the establishments that meet your needs and leave everyone else the hell alone.

One of my favorite restaurants in town is Che Guevara – it’s pretty much smoking everywhere. I don’t take my kids there because I don’t want them inhaling the second-hand smoke. The restaurant doesn’t owe me a smoke-free section – all they owe me is a good margarita at a reasonable price, on the rocks, with salt.

There is a silver lining, however:

Benton, 51, smoked for only a few months in high school, and his activism has cost him the real-estate sales position he acquired in January.

But his crusade, he says, is that important.

That’s what it is to the anti-smoking nazis, a religious crusade.

NO SIR has a website as well, if you’d like to learn more about this nanny-state organization.

Your White Trash Wednesday bloggers….


  1. i’ve started a ban on perfumes and colognes in public. it’s for the children. yes, people who wear perfume and colognes BEWARE! you’re next.


  2. I totaly agree with you,I in fact am a non-smokeras well.I have even writen the daily times with my opinion on the matter with much the same outlook.Keep up the good work!

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