1. Yeah, but there are more positives with midgets (little people? height challenged?) than negatives.

    I mean, the flat headed ones make great beer coasters… the girls don’t need to scuff up their knees giving you head… you can carry them in a backpack… they can change your cars oil without a jack… they can see the top shelf in the fridge without bending over… they can still play on playgrounds as adults… you can toss them without shifting a disc in your back… they can sit in the cooler and hand you beers…

    the list goes on and on!

  2. there’s not a midget alive that scott bowden can’t beat up! i’ll never forget the pounding on I put on Little Beaver years back.

    The Beaver, who was the It’s-a-Small World Midget champion, took a licking from me never before seen in these parts. i hit that Beaver so hard, its lips were bleeding. and don’t even get me started about his partner, Chili Bowl.

    hell, i once hired three midgets to clean my dollar-bill-shaped pool at the estate in germantown…but they drowned in the deep end.

    has “handosme” jimmy used to say about rival bill dundee (quoting randy newman): short people got no reason to live, baby.

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