I Felt A Surging In My Loins That Would Not Be Denied

Unfortunately for all of us, Petraeus’ staying power has caused yet another Premature Immaculation on the non-consensual backs of half the country:

Fair bit of advice, General?  Come clean for once.  You might save your family’s name and your country’s soul if they know the truth about the timing of how this went down the way it did.