The far left Washington Post dared to stare into the navel of darkness. A phone call from Mujahideen Mateen in the middle of his queer killing rampage.
The shock hits the Ace Reporter like a letter to the editor he doesn’t agree with. He’s taken aback. His safe space in the newsroom had its pretty panties yanked down over the phone, and what happened next – only a licensed otolaryngologist or speech pathologist will ever know:
And he was speaking it very quickly. And that is when I said to him, ‘Sir. Please. Speak in English, please.’”
“I did it for ISIS,” the caller said, according to Gentili, “I did it for the Islamic State.”
Clearly confused by Madeen’s admission of being an ISIS supporting jihadi, the audial rorschach of his keenly honed journalistic training took over:
Ace Reporter: Sir, I don’t understand. Did you say you’re a Trump loving, gayhating, Christian bigot?
The gentle refugee, seemingly more incensed in a fit a righteous rightwing rage continued…
Mateen: In shallah, with Allah as my witness, we are taking the fight to the great Satan America, and I have hostages in the bathroom of the club Pulse.
Ace Reporter:. Let me write this down…you plan on making America great again by locking the LGBT community out of a public bathroom. Is that what this is about?
Mateen:. For fuck’s sake, are you listening to me? My father is an inspiration and who has spoken with John Kerry and Charles Rangel personally about becoming the rightful president of Afghanistan and I am going to take my MCX rifle and exact divine justice on the amyl popping infidels!
Ace Reporter: You said Trump’s speech in Florida inspired you to buy a fully automatic AR-15 machine gun because of same sex bathrooms?
Mateen:. Are you using a Boost Mobile or some shit? I’m going to hang up and kill these fucking ankle grabbing rump rangers now. Your time will come.
And with that, my ear cried in awareness of the diversity being silenced by the consequence of Republican intolerance. Another AR-15, the deadliest, most high powered weapon conceived, weapon of choice that was only meant for the battlefield was in the hands of another bitter clinging NRA supporter.
If I had something to pray to, I’d do it. Hopefully, a cop not beating an innocent, unarmed African-American bound for college could use his gun to persuade this wayward son of climate change refugees out of the Faux News echo chamber of homphobic hate.
Or, an offering to Gaia to balm the feelings of shame I feel as an American college graduate, at all those Christian bakers cheering in the streets for cakes not being delivered to same sex marriage ceremonies. Now their ovens of hate will stay as cold as their bigoted hearts. As cold…as the graves.