It has been clear for the better part of the last six months that Sean Hannity has been angling, auditioning, and ass-kissing Trump to be his Press Secretary. Though it is doubtful Fox plans on doing anything about him, this latest feud between him and Bret Stephens at the WSJ appear to be part of a disturbing pattern:
On Thursday night/Friday morning, Hannity responded to Wall Street Journal columnist Bret Stephens, who called him “Fox News’ dumbest anchor.” Hannity had already started blaming Republican operatives for a potential Trump loss in November. He later applied this specifically to Stephens.
Wsj genius. Where were u when Boehner punted on the power of the purse a added nearly 5 trillion in new debt? https://t.co/oaH1b92PFS — Sean Hannity (@seanhannity) August 5, 2016
Hannity responded to the same tweet five times!
Where were you when R party refused to use the power of the purse to defund Obamacare ? https://t.co/oaH1b92PFS
— Sean Hannity (@seanhannity) August 5, 2016
Then he started using profanity.
Where were you dumbass when in 2014 R’s said the would stop Obama’s illegal and unconstitutional exec amnesty? https://t.co/oaH1b92PFS — Sean Hannity (@seanhannity) August 5, 2016
He dragged Stephens through the mud.
It’s arrogant, elitist, enablers like you that never hold R’s accountable that created the opening for Trump!! https://t.co/oaH1b92PFS
— Sean Hannity (@seanhannity) August 5, 2016
Then said that if Hillary Clinton won the election in November, people like Stephens would be to blame.
Right. Stephens is to blame for Trump. Not the guy who’s been his unquestioning sycophant since before April and who never misses an opportunity to kiss his son’s ass. What a great job he did raising him by the way. Trump the Elder should be more like him!
I don’t hold any affinity for Stephens. Sometimes he’s insightful and other times he is so incredibly offmark that I have to question if he’s a Putin stooge. But this Hannity character…I just don’t know.
I try to never listen to him but drivetime radio is awful and sometimes the dial lands on him. What is always consistent are the following:
1) Constant Trump cheerleading.
2) Constant reminders that he has a hotline to the Trump campaign
3) Daily reminders that he’s surrounded by ten foot tall bodyguards who shoot ninja throwing stars out of their asses and who are training him in the dark arts of the Samurai.
He doesn’t want to have to permanently disfigure you if you ask him a question in public but he clearly means to convey to his listeners that he can kill you seven different ways before you hit the ground.
He’s just warning you. He’s just warning you that you’re going to get hurt. And he doesn’t want to see that happen to you. Because that’s what’s going to happen, punk. You’re a little punk, you know that? You wanna say that to my face?
Don’t touch me!
4) But to all those naysayers, saying “nay” as they do, you can’t hurt him. He’s skin is tough as Hillary’s naughahyde pastrami flaps. Which is a little odd since he moisturizes twice daily with Chamonix and you should too! Karate man may bruise on the inside but his exterior is silky smooth thanks to Genucel and Dollar Shave Club’s Duck Butter.
5) Insert incessant recitals of what he imagines are devastating statistics that must be rolled out at least 10 times an hour (ex: the number of people out of the workforce, the #BLM protesters say to “fry pigs up like bacon”, ad nauseum) like some broken record payola DJ.
His act is older than Donald Trump’s next wife but the issue is that he is more in the tank than Dukakis.
If Fox wanted to maintain any semblance of of being fair and balanced, Hannity should be indefinitely suspended so that he can help Trump run for President.
Sure the establishment Republicans and conservatives (read: not the same people), who make up the 60+% of Republicans who did not support Trump in the primary, are keeping their distance but what’s the real reason for the Trump drop?
Maybe it’s because he’s been less concerned with running against Hillary Clinton than he has been about running against Republicans in Congress that he would need to enact what he’s campaigning on.
Maybe floating that he’s going to donate $20MM of his own money to launch a SuperPac to unseat Ted Cruz in 2018 (that’s over two years from now by the way for those counting on what a petty fucking asshole Trump intends to be) and Mike Lee or throwing elbows against insufferable and longstanding shitbirds like John McCain, Paul Ryan, and Kelly Ayotte or engaging in his mano-a-mano fight with Khizr Khan instead of having a surrogate do it is a little premature.
I haven’t seen anyone this needlessly self-destructive since Marty McFly got called chicken in “Back To The Future”.
Maybe it was Vice President Gingrich, oh excuse me, that didn’t happen. That same Gingrich who, Hannity heavily lobbied Trump to name as his VP, came out and said they needed to stage an intervention to save this maniac from himself last week. I guess Newter didn’t like being cast aside once Giuliani gave his kinda sorta stirring, raspy call-to-arms at the RNC convention and took his and Christie’s place as lead buttboy. Mike Pence is unavailable for comment since he appears to have gone into the Witness Relocation Program.
I expect no better from the thin-skinned, control freak, ADHD candidate with a complete inability to delegate since no one is as smart as he is, but if we want Trump to win then we’ve got to let Hannity strap on his helmet. Have him put his clipboard down and get him in the game, coach! I mean Boss, sir. Mr. Trump. My Liege.
Surely, you all can live without him for 11 weeks.
And just as an exit note, if you come out and say you’re “probably going to spend $20MM to setup a SuperPAC” against my candidate two years from now because you’re butthurt that he didn’t kiss your ass after you lied about him and his wife and father like a dog – you can, in fact, fuck off and die. You can’t say that Trump must respond to Khan because this offense cannot stand and not think Cruz has no right to stand against Trump for what he said about him.
You can. But you’re a hypocrite.
I didn’t #NeverTrump. Trump Never Me’d.