Old Media

An IRS Full of Lynndie Englands

Lynndie England

Remember when low-level functionaries operating outside the law were the direct responsibility of The President and the type of lawless culture he promoted?  I mean, it’s not applicable now since 94% of the IRS employees union donates money to Obama and the post-Modern media is incapable of making the logical conclusion that there is a correlation between that number and the shared beliefs of the two.

And even less so, since buck passing has risen in popularity over the last several years:

The Roots of Abu Ghraib

Published: June 09, 2004

In response to the outrages at Abu Ghraib, the Bush administration has repeatedly assured Americans that the president and his top officials did not say or do anything that could possibly be seen as approving the abuse or outright torture of prisoners.

Since the Abu Ghraib scandal broke into public view, the administration has contended that a few sadistic guards acted on their own to commit the crimes we’ve all seen in pictures and videos. At times, the White House has denied that any senior official was aware of the situation, as it did with Red Cross reports documenting a pattern of prisoner abuse in Iraq. In response to a rising pile of documents proving otherwise, the administration has mounted a ”Wizard of Oz” defense, urging Americans not to pay attention to inconvenient evidence.

Today, those purveyors of Ozian prevarications are called Jay Carney, Dan Pfeiffer and David Plouffe.  By the current definition, Abu Ghraib would have only been possible if you were able to produce timestamped e-mails from George Bush to Lynndie England advising her on her patriotic duty to point at terrorists’ junk and building gay pyramids with them.  Anything else is just “political hay” and “distractions”.

Lying Prick

Lying Prick:  Lying like the prickishly, pig-snouted sociopath he is.  Prick.

After all, Bush should have refrained from “Wizard of Oz” defenses and gone straight for the “Duh, I found out when you guys did when I read the paper this morning” defense.  Who wouldn’t be encouraged by the current President’s seemingly drunk driving while blindfolded, hands-off-the-wheel, pedal to the metal approach to governing?  That stupid Bush didn’t read papers but he was the personal Torquemada of systemic torture at a makeshift prison on the other side of the world when not clearing out brush on his ranch of hate.

But we know that Obama is not a hands off person.  He’s a control freak.  And the only time that he of a million “I, I, I, I” speeches is nowhere near the Captain’s Quarters is when there is some blame needing be placed.

We do not know how high up in the chain of command the specific sanction for abusing prisoners was given, and we may never know, because the Army is investigating itself and the Pentagon is stonewalling the Senate Armed Services Committee. It may yet be necessary for Congress to form an investigative panel with subpoena powers to find the answers.

What we have seen, topped by that legalistic treatise on torture, shows clearly that Mr. Bush set the tone for this dreadful situation by pasting a false ”war on terrorism” label on the invasion of Iraq.

Ah, yes.  “Tone setting”.

Surely, the New York Times is positing a similar thought this weekend in the wake of widespread, years long IRS persecution of ideologically and religiously litmus-tested groups in order to quell their patriotic dissent before an election.  Surely, their flame of outrage would burn brightly out of consistency alone!  To do so otherwise would be bare assed hypocrisy.

NEWS that employees at the Internal Revenue Service targeted groups with “Tea Party” or “patriot” in their name for special scrutiny has raised pious alarms among some lawmakers and editorial writers.

Yes, the I.R.S. may have been worse than clumsy in considering an (ed. – non-existent) avalanche of applications for nonprofit status under the tax code, and that deserves scrutiny whether or not the agency’s employees were spurred by partisan motives. After all, some of these “tea party” groups are most likely not innocent nonprofit organizations devoted to the cultural significance of hot beverages — or to other, more civic, virtues. Rather, they and others are groups that may be illegally spending a majority of their resources on political activity while manipulating the tax code to hide their donors and evade taxes (the unwritten rule being that no more than 49 percent of a group’s resources can be used for political purposes).

For the people who demand that you provide videotaped confessions, time stamped e-mails and caught-red-handed evidence that Obama had absolutely nothing to do with he political targeting of his enemies and of which he was the direct beneficiary of that persecution, they certainly have no problem proclaiming allegations of tax evasion of nefarious motives to the victims in this instance while excusing the IRS perpetrators as merely “clumsy” with zero evidence whatsoever.

Where was this caveat as to the inherent guilt of those Abu Ghraib prisoners?  Were those prison guards not laboring under conditions worse than the cubicle dwelling paper miners at the IRS?

Congress has already announced hearings and investigations, and the service’s leadership will be grilled, as it should be. But it would be a travesty if the misdeeds here undermined the important work that must now be done to foster greater transparency, and to bolster confidence that the I.R.S. is in fact scrutinizing politically active groups across the board, regardless of their ideological bent.

Citizens need to rest assured that the integrity of our political system is intact.

As opposed to publishing inflammatory pictures and making unsubstantiated allegations in bad faith that sexual abuse of enemy combantants was demanded from on high in order to enflame Islamic fundamentalists to attack our service people because you wanted to lay blame for low-level military personnel’s behavior at the feet of the Commander-In-Chief with the non-preferred party letter after their name.  In order to “assure the integrity of our political system”.

If it wasn’t for double standards, the New York Times would have no standards at all.

UPDATE:  Even a stodgey old hack like Bob Schieffer finally had enough of the aforementioned Capital “P” Prick Dan Pfeiffer’s bald-faced obfuscations this morning.  When the Wilford Brimley of the Obama’s old media water carriers starts telling you to you to your stupid oinking face that you are sounding like Nixon during Watergate, it might be time to reverse course on demanding that Republicans apologize for impugning the reputation of Susan Rice for lying to the American People on five morning talk shows in a row.

You know, Dan.  Can I call you Dan?  Gunga Dan.  Your boss, Mr. Post-Racial, was at the race-based Morehouse College explaining to their graduating future welfare recipients that they are going to have to work “twice as hard” as white people just “to get by”.  That means that they would have to lie twice as hard as you to be in your position.  Hard to even imagine how that’s possible.

Exit question.  Why can’t anyone call a lie a “lie” anymore?  It’s dolled up in euphemisms like “you’re not telling the truth” or providing some golden bridge excuse for a lack of honesty.  When you’re a liar, you’re a liar.  Capital “L”, little “i”, little “a”, little “r”.  Liar.  Dan The Lying Prickface Pfeiffer.  End of story.

But I do understand how in this economy of your boss’s making that a House Cracka gotta eat and if it means going on tv and mouthing a few of Master’s lies to let you back on the porch that Obama’s House Crackas gotta do what a cracka gotta do.  You’re a better man than I, Gunga Dan.

Extreme Image Makeover: NYT Boston Bomber Edition

It’s been a week so let’s do this.  We can’t hold our tongues any longer.

The fifth column fourth estate has been pulling their hair out this week to invent some way to explain away the tag team terrorist Tsarnaev family’s violent lashing out for reasons heretofore unknown.

Was it brain injuries from boxing?  Umm, no.  Given how many people box at the amateur and professional level it seems like more would have built pressure cooker bombs before that connection could be made.

Did McDonald’s get their order wrong?  Do they hate Boston Baked Beans?  Perhaps they were Jets fans and just wanted to strike out on Patriot’s Day.  Terrorists do tend to love jets.

This piece of revisionist filth regurgitated by the New York Times onto the graves of the people murdered takes the cake though.  I am warning authorities in advance not to allow any New York Times fanfictioneers to have access to the surviving jihadi because that cake will most certainly have a file in it:

 BOSTON — It was a blow the immigrant boxer could not withstand: after capturing his second consecutive title as the Golden Gloves heavyweight champion of New England in 2010, Tamerlan Anzorovich Tsarnaev, 23, was barred from the national Tournament of Champions because he was not a United States citizen.

That’s the opening line.  The Narrative is congealing at room temperature much like the Times Reporters IQs.  This meek, innocent little lamb in our strange and confusing country (that didn’t ask him to come by the way) was terribly wronged by our immigration policy.

You know what’s a blow some people can’t stand?  I mean besides not being able to participate in a sport.  Losing your leg.  Or  a child.  Or his sister.  Or a parent because some deranged lunatics decided to detonate bombs at a public event of patriotic significance to hurt as many random people as possible.

Your mileage may vary but typically someone dying rates higher than some alleged sporting event snub.  Not in the morally equivalent universe of the New York Times though.  Having said that, I never made the school basketball team.  Would it be acceptable if I murdered the first 100 commenters in any given New York Times thread?

The cocksure fighter, a flamboyant dresser partial to white fur and snakeskin, had been looking forward to redeeming the loss he suffered the previous year in the first round, when the judges awarded his opponent the decision, drawing boos from spectators who considered Mr. Tsarnaev dominant.

His aspirations frustrated, he dropped out of boxing competition entirely, and his life veered in a completely different direction.

So much for overcoming adversity.  The only thing “cock” that I am sure about is that the New York Times wants to suck his.

His girlfriend at the time had called 911, “hysterically crying,” to say he had beaten her up, according to the Cambridge police report. Mr. Tsarnaev told the officers that he had slapped her face because she had been yelling at him about “another girl.”

Eventually, charges against him would be dismissed, the records show, so the episode would not have endangered his eventual citizenship application.

*Pfew*  Lucky us.  The article blithely notes how this fabled *heavyweight* Golden Glove boxer used his petite wife as a punching bag.  The wife who gave him a child and who, outside of gubmint welfare, was financially supporting his lazy ass while he was cheating on her.  Unimportant details.  I know.  There is apparently a Tomb of the Unknown Victim in the War on Women as written by the NYT.

Mr. Tsarnaev portrayed his quitting as a reflection of the sport’s incompatibility with his growing devotion to Islam. But as dozens of interviews with friends, acquaintances and relatives from Cambridge to Dagestan showed, that devotion, and the suspected radicalization that accompanied it, was a path he followed most avidly only after his more secular dreams were dashed in 2010 and he was left adrift.

So Islamic Terrorism can be solved by Midnight Basketball.  Is that the gist of this?

His wife primarily supported the family through her job as a home health aide, scraping together about $1,200 a month to pay the rent. While she worked, Mr. Tsarnaev looked after their daughter, Zahira, who was learning to ride the tricycle still parked beside the house, neighbors said.

One blows them up and the other visits their home twice a week to change their bedpans.  They’ve got all the bases covered.

As Salaam A-Sweetback.  So where did the BMWs and Mercedes come from?  How does one “survive” on $1200 a month for a family of three and he’s driving a luxury sedan?  Or not work.  You’re fit to box but not to lift one?

The NYT’s piece drones on for three more full length pages of hagiogaphy of this premeditated murderer of innocent men, women and children in an effort to redeem his terrorist attack into a cudgel to use against Republicans for not wanting to bless 30 million illegal aliens with citizenship, welfare checks and Obamaphones.

The connection couldn’t be any clearer as to the cause of the Boston Tea Party Massacre.  It was a cry for help on Immigration Reform!  As for his radicalization, we’ll have to blame the pedantry of the government that is preparing to run our healthcare for that one I guess:

After his return (from Russia and Dagestan), Mr. Tsarnaev applied for American citizenship, a year after he was eligible to do so. But the F.B.I. investigation, though closed, had caused his application to be stalled. Underscoring how detached he had become, he no longer had any valid passport, or international travel document, and Cambridge, to which he had a hard time readapting, was now his de facto home more than ever.

You didn’t complete your form in time Mr. Jihadi.  I hope observing our passport rules does not cause you to become “detached” or have trouble “re-adapting” to our incredibly flawed country that has let you down in so many other ways yet still allowed you back for some reason.

He grew a five-inch beard, which he shaved off before the bombings, and interrupted prayers at his mosque on two occasions with outbursts denouncing the idea that Muslims should observe American secular holidays. He engaged neighbors in affable conversations about skiing one week and heated ones about American imperialism the next.

In other words, your average New York Times reader.

At a neighborhood pizzeria, wearing a head covering that matched his jacket, he explained to Albrecht Ammon, 18, that “the Koran is great and flawless, and the Bible is ripped off from the Koran, and the U.S. used the Bible as an excuse to invade different countries.”

If only there had been some clue.  If only there is some way we could determine what made him go off?  What did *we* do wrong to him?  This is clearly our fault.  Our battered women’s shelter of a country.  We can change him.  We know we can!

“I asked him about radical Muslims that blow themselves up and say, ‘It’s for Allah,’ ” Mr. Ammon said. “And he said he wasn’t one of those Muslims.”

Clearly someone asked the right questions and clearly someone lied.

Like how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop, the world may never know the countless ways America failed the Tsarnaev family.  Luckily, the New York Times is there to explain  it to us.  It was not radical Islam that blew up those Boston Marathoners, it was Washington gridlock on immigration and the country that callously gave him political asylum, a life, a child and enough free handouts to allow him to afford white furs, snakeskins, designer clothes and luxury cars but not allow him to professionally punch people other than his wife.

From this point forward, we should cut all that shit out and manage the immigrating scum of the Earth’s expectations accordingly so that they are not let down if their dreams are dashed upon the rocks of reality.

The streets are paved with blood and bone.  Abandon hope all who enter.  We are a nation of immigrants but it was the last batch that made it that way.

Post Script:  But Rick Perry is solely responsible for that plant explosion in Waco.  Terrorists aren’t responsible.  Politicians are!

Except for the Boston terrorists.  They’re still not responsible and certainly not Obama/Schumer/McCain/Rubio come-one-come-all even if you’re on a terrorist watchlist approach.

The Shortest Straw Has Been Drawn For You

And you’re welcome.

I always love Yahoo’s trashy “list” pieces.  Which cars get better mileage than a Prius.  Five vodka cocktails that aren’t lame.  How many dildoes can Kim Kardashian stuff in her Coach bag.

Oddly enough, this one caught my eye:

The Next 4 Years:  Show us what you want changed in Obama’s Second Term

Sadly, no dramatic re-enactments from Ford Theater made the list or Obama defecting to Venezuela to take Hugo Chavez’s place.

What are your hopes for the next four years? President Barack Obama begins his second term in office on Jan. 20, with a hefty number of important issues facing the nation, including:

* Immigration reform
* Gun control
* Federal spending
* Environmental protection
* Gay marriage
* A changing military
* Education reform
* Health care
* Afghanistan
* Washington gridlock

What do these issues mean to you?

Yahoo News is asking you to help us tell this story. Here’s how you can participate:

Gee.  What is missing from that list?  As usual with the insulated Obamatards, JOBS are somehow no longer a problem.

I mean the unemployment rate has been jerryrigged to under 8% so everything’s coming up Milhouse.

everything is coming up milhouse

But it does read like the Donald Kaul column demanding that we do something about a million things that don’t matter while assassinating the few people who are trying to protect the most important check in the  Constitution. Littered with Obamanian false premises leading to the narrowly defined false choice “answers” that will scupper your simple minds in to acknowledging.  We’ve got to do something about guns because a crazy person got one and did something bad.  And if you don’t then you want kids to die.

How many get into a car everyday?  Why are cars made to drive faster than the speed limit?  Why are beers served in sizes and alcohol contents so great as to get you over the legal limit with one?  Why, why, why does personal freedom stand in the way saving Just One Life ™.  Because if we could limit all of those things and save one life It Would Be Worth It.

The only difference is that Obama typically asserts that everyone, even his detractors somehow, a majority of them agree with him but – darnit – just can’t bring themselves to applaud how right he is out of petty politics.

It’s like a rapist demanding you admit that he’s got staying power and stamina for days.  You’re welcome.

One thing I’d like on the list is for Obama to get off the furking golf course and get Harry Reid to pass a budget for the first time in five years.  Also, not on the list.   Quit nominating traitors to key positions.  Quit looting the Treasury to fatten his union thugs.  Quit negotiating with terrorists behind our backs.  Quit instructing troops to give more sensitivity to the Taliban than Obama gives to half the country.  Or maybe, just someone in the media telling him or the first Wookie that there are actually numerous areas of our personal lives that don’t demand the invasive penis of government being thrust into reluctant anus of a public that would like to be left alone.

I know I speak for Obama when I say that everyone wants government up their asses.  Particularly his government, whose penis/executive orders they love, but just can’t bring themselves to admit it.

As long as we’re making up stuff that’s never going to happen…what do you wish would change in Obama’s second term?


Time Magazine Names Adam Lanza Person Of The Year

Sure he’s late to the party and kept to himself.  Mostly.

But there’s no denying that Lanza is Time’s gender neutral “Person” of the Year.

The competition was already murder.  Between Mohammed Morsi, Kim Jong-Un, Sandra Fluke, The Undocumented American – it wasn’t the quantity of people killed but the quality.

What this lanky, saucer eyed mass murderer has done is greater than any Arab Spring.  He’s ushered in the American Fall and the movement to repeal the 2nd Amendment to the United States Constitution.   Many great progressives died on that battlefield of non-gunshot related injuries but it took one brave, differently abled young man to succeed where so many others failed.  With each round he pumped into those elementary school children, our hearts skipped a beat and swelled with pride.  His gun may have been in those cherubic faces but his name was on everyone’s tongue.

What’s he doing??? What’s he wearing??? Ya know?  What makes him tick?  Was his mother a drunk redneck who got what she deserved?

Like watching a young child learn to ride a bicycle, the smile on our faces grew as we watched our own country maturing before our eyes in realization that gun ownership is just plain wrong.  Even hardcore rightwing Republicans like Joe Scarborough and Michael Bloomberg or avid Democrat hunters like Joe Manchin could not deny the tidal wave of change – statistics be damned.

The usual rapid fire NRA put it’s guns in the ground and observed a weeklong silence in agreement that they were totally responsible for what happened.

The sacrifice those kids made for the good of the nation is greater than any fingerpaint or prom they were going to attend.  With each little coffin being delivered to the funeral home we clinked our champagne glasses and toasted Adam Lanza. After all, you can’t make a firearm outlawing omelet without gunning down a few 29th trimester fetuses.  To be certain, we washed the champagne down with bittersweet tears.

No other candidate could even come close to having such a positive impact on our world while making us completely re-evaluate our longheld position on homeschooling.

On behalf of the entire Mainstream Media Complex, we’d like to extend our highest honor to Adam Lanza.  Time Magazine’s Person of the Year.


The Time Magazine Editorial Board

Who Isn’t Responsible For The Sandy Hook Slaughter?

If experience has taught me anything it is that the actual shooter cannot be held responsible for what happened.  Obviously.  Jared Loughner was not responsible.  Sarah Palin was.  Timothy McVeigh wasn’t responsible.  Rush Limbaugh was.   Lee Harvey Oswald wasn’t responsible.  Lyndon Johnson was – but I digress on that point.  We can’t pass the Adam Lanza Registration Act or wargame the Cuckoobird Matrix to see which fine, upstanding Liberal Arts major is going to come down with a case of the shooties or stabbies.

What poor, disaffected youth was not hugged enough – or maybe hugged too much!  Like Goldlilocks, we can’t find that “just right” balance.

So who is to blame? Because, by God, We Have To Do Something…Anything ™.  Preferably before this crisis has gone to waste.  We can discern how the media will react since it’s a rerun.

Like all good fascists, Michael Moore tried to disarm all Americans in Bowling for Columbine after another couple of pampered blue-state rejects decided to shoot up their high school.  A shooting that would later be glamorized in the television series An American Horror Story that sought to humanize the school shooter.  Expect the cavalcade of hypocritical Hollywood A listers to flaunt their high school diplomas too as they make a living in tv and movies where they blow through more ammo on the big screen than they do cocaine in their personal lives.

Violent TV Shows and Music Officially Not Responsible For Anything you blameshifting gun nutters.

Over the years everything from goth culture, violent video games, movies, music, prozac, adderall, gangster rap and somehow rightwing radio seems to catch the blame for the thousand failures they weren’t.  None of which are going to be blamed this time.  With the exception of Rush Limbaugh who is responsible for everything bad that happens in the world.

Don’t Do What Darth Did.

Not this time though.  The fix was in before the killer was wrongly identified.  It was automatic assault rifles that were banned but are now flooding the schoolyards (OMG!!! The Children!) even though no one outside of a gun dealer can own an automatic weapon.  And in the meantime, every amateur Pat Robertson will hammer the square peg of their pet cause into the bullethole of reality.

On the right and the left.  Unashamed exhibitionists flogging themselves senseless in full view of The Children!!!(tm) everywhere to this XXX-rated grief porn until the waterworks squirt like the cathartic money shot.

None will ever ask why is it the “gun free” zones seem to be attacked so frequently or that the people who demand that you be defenseless in order to frequent their business or forced to attend their school bear no responsiblity for protecting you when you do so.

We’re just having a dialogue don’t you know?  A dialogue that always supports infringing on the Bill of Rights in order to protect the powerful instead of meaningful reforms to bad laws that can ultimately protect future victims.  Now that would be a revolutionary act in the age of the stupid and opportunistic.

Absolute Moral Authority: I’ll See Your Sheehan And Raise You A SEAL

For instructional purposes, let’s assume every Leftist calling themselves a “Democrat” is suffering from Stage 4 Obamnesia and are having a hard time understanding why the Benghazi debacle is such a big deal.  Most US Ambassadors to other nations aren’t signing up for a suicide mission.  Chris Stevens certainly wasn’t and neither were the few protectors he was given.  Much fewer protectors than Valerie Jarrett I might add even though he was in a war zone of Commander Leave-No-Drone-Behind’s making.

The father of a former Navy SEAL killed in the Libya terror attack last month said Friday that U.S. officials who denied a request for help while the diplomatic compound in Benghazi was under attack “are murderers of my son.”

Charles Woods was reacting to accounts by Fox News sources that a request from the CIA annex for backup was denied by U.S. officials. His son, Tyrone Woods, was killed in the Sept. 11 assault.

“They refused to pull the trigger,” Woods said. “Those people who made the decision and who knew about the decision and lied about it are murderers of my son.” 

Woods said he forgives whoever denied the apparent request, but he urged them to “stand up.” 

Intelligence building for weeks and pointing to an attack on the anniversary of 9/11 went unheeded.  Oh, but there is so much intelligence out there they’ve said.  Unlike say, one Richard Clarke memo saying somewhere, some time, some place Osama bin Laden is going to try to attack the United States – again.  Mainly, because he’s still around since Clarke failed in his job for eight years to stop him.

“Send help!” the Ambassador cries to a stonefaced Hillary Clinton.  Why do you need help??? We liberated Libya.  “You’re welcome!”, she replied.

A distress call goes out.  The barbarians are literally banging on the gates and there is nothing but voicemail answering in Washington, D.C.  It’s the dinner hour, dontchaknow?  That’s the best case scenario.  The worst case is that the Not Ready For Primetime Players were paralyzed by wanting to get permission to fly into Libyan sovereign air space.  The space we provided them while they refused to protect our embassy.

What do we honestly expect Obama or Clinton to do in this situation?  To behave Presidentially?  Now who hasn’t been paying attention for the last four years?

With troops an hour away, Hillary Clinton, Barack Hussein Obama and Leon Panetta made a conscious decision to leave their representatives’ fates to an al Qaeda mob.  No back-up.  No fly-by.  After all, you can’t just send the most sophisticated and heavily armed military into a conflict that hasn’t already been wargamed for months.

The U.S. military did not get involved during the attack on the U.S. mission in Benghazi, Libya, last month because officials did not have enough information about what was going on before the attack was over, Secretary of Defense Leon Panetta said Thursday.

At a Pentagon news briefing, Panetta said there was no “real-time information” to be able to act on, even though the U.S. military was prepared to do so.

“You don’t deploy forces into harm’s way without knowing what’s going on,” Panetta said. “(We) felt we could not put forces at risk in that situation.”

Apparently al Qaeda in Libya was slyly not updating their Twitter feed to provide their exact GPS coordinates.  When the Chinese or the Russians attack, I hope they will be respectful of our need to prepare first.  Regardless, what’s done is done.  Leon Panetta would not send our troops in to save our Ambassador and his team because they would not be prepared for every eventuality.  Unlike an unarmed diplomatic team purposefully made defenseless and whose concerns were ignored for months who should have known better.

Are any of our other Ambassadors in hotspots listening to this?

Which brings us to Cindy Sheehan.  I know we have a longstanding rule about not bringing Mama Moonbat’s name back up on this blog but this is relevant.  For years, Sheehan and “Camp Casey” were covered and promoted by the Leftwing Media while Bush was in office. For years, Sheehan defiled her son’s memory and sacrifice to be a useful media tool against George Bush.  But where is this same media for Charles Woods?  Is the loss of his son somehow less worthy since there’s a “D” in the White House for the next few days? Maybe Woods should travel abroad and call Obama the terrorist that he is to the delight of the NY Times editorial board.

Mother Sheehan allegedly had Absolute Moral Authority ™ because her son died on a mission he volunteered for twice. Is he supposed to camp out on the streets of Hyde Park, Martha’s Vineyard, or San Francisco and Las Vegas star-studded fundraisers to hold up posterboard signs,  dance with Al Sharpton or hug on Hugo Chavez when his Navy SEAL son was made to die because it was inconvenient for Obama to leave the campaign trail and focus on his job for a few hours?  The one job he actually has to do.  He had one job!  That was it.

As ABC, NBC, CBS, CNN, MSNBC, Google Current, the New York Times, the LA Times and the rest jockey to change the subject in the waning days of this election, the one thing that can’t change is what bald-faced propagandists they’ve been throughout this scandal from Candy Crowley on down.   Charles Woods raised a certified hero and they have kidnapped his son’s story and are holding it in the concrete basement of an undisclosed location so that it never sees the light of day.  Al Qaeda in Libya killed the people in our embassy.  The Mainstream Media buried the truth with them and blamed it on a Youtube video.  If they think that the Islamonazis riot over low-rent Youtube videos, just what do they think is going to happen when Harvey Heavy Weinstein spikes the Osama football right before the election?

We should probably go ahead and arrest him now.  Pre-emtively placate the savages by beheading in advance of its release.  The future does not belong to those who slander one of Allah’s most loyal followers.

Woods is being forced to give his interviews to Glenn Beck and Lars Larson for Christ’s sake.  Is Scott Pelley too busy gobbling down Obama’s protein throatshake to dust he knees off and cover a bona fide scandal not involving a BBC television host?  People died in this one.

Woods, in interviews earlier this week, also described a series of conversations he had with administration officials at the memorial service held Sept. 14. He said that Secretary of State Hillary Clinton — despite signs early on that militants were behind the attack — pledged to him at that event that she would pursue the maker of an anti-Islam film that had been linked to other protests. 

“Her countenance was not good and she made this statement to me … she said we will make sure that the person who made that film is arrested and prosecuted,” he said on radio host Glenn Beck’s online show, adding that she also apologized.

Woods said he “could tell that she was not telling me the truth.” 

Clinton made good on that promise though.  That filmmaker is still in jail WITHOUT BOND and hasn’t been heard from or seen by anyone. No media demanding an interview.  No ACLU filing suit.  No Hollywood First Amendment Firsters withholding their million dollar contributions to Herr-sein Obama’s brownshirts.  In fact, the latest articles in a Google News search show no updates since September 28th.

The message to our nation’s enemies can’t be clearer.  Attack us with impunity and we will not protect our own.  The message to our warriors is unmistakeable.  Your President hates you as much as what you stand for and will leave you to die while on the mission he assigned you.  And the press will not even try to get to the bottom of it.

Let’s talk about poll numbers.  Or Big Bird or Binders or Bullshit.

Or you can add Insult Ignominy to Injury:

“Did your son always have balls the size of cue balls?” — Vice President Joe Biden to Charles Woods, grieving father of slain Navy SEAL Tyrone Woods, during a memorial service at Andrews Air Force Base in Maryland.

I believe the saying is that you have balls the size of church bells.  And they make a clangedy-clang sound when I walk down the street. \

Either way, inappropriate for a goddamned Memorial Service, Plugs.  It’s bad enough you killed his son, do you have to let everyone know that you’ve got his balls on your mind at the funeral?  Save that for the bathhouse with Barry.  Impeachable offense IMO.


Well-Behaved Reporters Rarely Make History

And well-behaved reporters rarely get to make potty without an escort either apparently:

Still trying to figure out why press can’t even go to bathroom here at Biden event in IA without an Obama campaign volunteer as an escort.

Audience free to move around, go to bathroom w/out campaign escort at Biden event in Council Bluffs, just the press need one. Still a puzzle


Let me help solve the “puzzle” for you, hon.  You’re a hack and a lackey of the campaign.  Your job is to be a stenographer for the White House press release and not to report on what was actually said.

Now sit in your piss pants and like it you bootlicking sycophant.

It never occurred to Polly Pisspants that well-behaved women rarely make history.  Barring an armed guard grabbing her by the elbow and throwing her out on the street that she could always just NOT follow Herr Biden’s diktats.  But what Daddy says goes I guess.

Because you know what really looks good after a President’s disastrous national debate?  Abusing the press corps and waging a war on women reporters who struggle to make 70% of what a man reporter makes anyway.   Maybe under Obamacare you can have some balls implanted since your ovaries have left you professionally handicapped.

#CNNFail – Like Watching The Roadrunner On Meth Vs. Wile E. Coyote On Downers

Prime Minister Netanyahu needs to be wearing his white lab coat and pocket protector as he makes his rounds to drop mad science on the D minus students who are  America’s dumbest talking heads:

CNN’s Candy Crowley: What we know is, of course, Iran is allowed under agreements, international agreements, to go ahead and do what it’s doing because there are legitimate peaceful purposes for enriching this uranium

Benjamin Netanyahu: You think so? You think so, Candy? That’s like — let me. It’s not legitimate. This is a country that talks about, denies the Holocaust, promises to wipe out Israel, is engaged in terror throughout the world. It’s like Timothy McVeigh walking into a shop in Oklahoma City and saying, ‘I would like to tend my garden. I’d like to buy some fertilizer.’ ‘How much do you you want?’ ‘I don’t know, 20,000 pounds.’

*Meep* *Meep*.  It’s like watching the Roadrunner on methamphetamine vs Wile E. Coyote on painkillers.  Luckily for Wile E. Crowley, the piano of logic that was dropped from the top floor of CNN’s headquarters to her waiting noggin below won’t be able to penetrate either her or her viewers’ blast door thick craniums.  Like all good cartoons, she’ll just crawl through the mangled ebonies, ivories, wires and splinters to dust herself off none the wiser.

Just for the record, that’s CNN giving the benefit of the doubt to Iran’s intentions on enriching uranium.  The same CNN announcer who will be stacking the deck moderating for a Presidential debate in the next month.

Thank God for New Media

Remember when this stuff was said unchallenged? I do.

If it weren’t for the rise of the Internet and New Media, we would think that Trayvon Martin was a kid murdered by a convicted felon and that Romney was amazed by a touch-screen.

At least we’re dealing with an enemy that is so predictable. Here’s to hoping there are people smarter than us who can leverage this Dinosaur Media’s shopworn tactics against them.

(sirloin tip Jim Treacher)

Mexican Standoffish

Testy tyrant President Oblameless got to give a dress rehearsal of his The American President speech this afternoon in the Rose Garden.  It’s not the first time we’ve seen it.  After wiping his ass on the Constitution in front of the White House Stenography Pool, one brave reporter had the temerity to ask him a question in a stunning breach of lickspittle subservience etiquette that was adopted and strictly enforced immediately following the Peeved Prez’s Immaculation.

Apparently asking a question is now considered “heckling”.  It’s also very unpatriotic to yell out a question to the President before he can make his patented Coward’s Exit after announcing the abdication of his responsibility to protect this country in order to make a desperate election year pander to Hispanics or something.

Spitting in the faces of millions of unemployed Americans?  Ok.

Spitting in the faces of those all of the world taking the legal path to citizenship?  Ok.

Laying out the welcome mat for every Mexican felon to get a fresh start in the U.S. if they can get here in the next four months?  Ok.

But asking a question while Oblah,blah filibusters his own press conference before dashing away from the cameras is what’s unpatriotic.

The alleged “standards” for Obamnesty are as follows:

came to the United States under the age of sixteen;
has continuously resided in the United States for a least five years preceding the date of this memorandum and is present in the United States on the date ofthis memorandum;
is currently in school, has graduated from high school, has obtained a general education development certificate, or is an honorably discharged veteran of the Coast Guard or Armed Forces ofthe United States;
has not been convicted of a felony offense, a significant misdemeanor offense, multiple misdemeanor offenses, or otherwise poses a threat to national security or public safety; and
is not above the age of thirty.

Umm, how do you know the age of someone when they are – by definition – undocumented?

We’re going to profile  and discriminate against them by age.  Is that correct?

How do you know someone came before the age of 16 when there is no record?  You don’t.

What’s a successful student?  One who attends.

What stops any 30 year old in Mexico from running across the border tonight and claiming they’ve been here for the last five years or since they were a child?  Nothing at all.

The fact that they may not have been convicted in the U.S. doesn’t erase their criminal history in their native country.  The rapist, the murderer, the cartel member. If I ran a Mexican prison I would load every felon and insane crazy person on a bus and drop them off on the border tonight like a modern day Mariel Boatlift.

Granting Amnesty is “fair and right” but the discretionary enforcement by ICE and Homeland Security will be used to prosecute older illegals because of their age?  I’m sorry but I just don’t buy that particular line of bullshit.

This is Amnesty for everyone in this country regardless of whether they are from Mexico, Yemen or China.  Plain and simple.  Get here, shit out a kid and sign up for your free Obamacare Medical Card and map to the welfare office.  Followed shortly by your union card and directions to the voting booth.

You’re an American college student paying an exorbitant out-of-state tuition?  Tough shit, home slice.  That illegal alien is now going to get a cheaper college education than you.

You’ve been on unemployment for two years because you can’t find a job?  Congratulations.  I’d like to introduce you to  800,000 several million of your new competitors.

This is the death of Democracy.  When the will of the people is thwarted by a President who knows he is going to lose so he pours gas on whatever fire is in front of him.

Thank you Daily Caller for doing what every other news organization in this country is failing to do.  Thank you for coming down on Obama harder than Romney is going to do along with his VP Marco “Jose Biden” Rubio.

Our only hope at this point is for Congress to request a special review by the Supreme Court and for the southern Governors bordering Mexico to shoot or arrest everyone entering their state by illegal means for the next 5 months.

Your traitor President has stabbed every American in the back and invited a crime wave that will be felt for years if it is not challenged vigorously and immediately.

Unfortunately for us all, too many Republicans just breathed a sigh of relief that Obama did in an afternoon what they’ve been afraid to do for years.

EXIT QUESTION:  Isn’t it just another great coincidence, not unlike the Washington Post running their “Romney bullies homos from 50 years ago at the same time Obama evolves on gay marriage”, that Time Magazine’s cover story yesterday is about a bunch of illegal aliens standing up and saying that they are not afraid of being deported.

No collusion at all from The White House and the media.  Just another coincidence I’m sure!

Gay-Hating, Magic Underwear Wearing Pack of Wild Dogs Attacks Flock of Seagulls. Or Not.

How desperate is the “All-In” media to polish the turd of Obama’s re-election campaign?  Desperate enough to give top of the fold coverage to half a century old allegations of high school pranks.

Prepare yourself for the nastiest campaign in American history.  And look at that turd shine:

…this morning the Washington Post dropped what had to be an intentionally-timed bomb on presumptive nominee Mitt Romney. Within hours of Obama suddenly deciding to stop lying about his position on same-sex marriage, the Washington Post read Mitt Romney’s teenage mind,  found it anti-gay, and in a huge, attention-getting feature worked hand-in-hand with the Obama campaign to paint their likely challenger as a snooty, wealthy, homophobic, prep school bully.

This is the best they’ve got.

We’re to believe that Mitt The Mormon was running around like a “pack of wild dogs” at the same time that Obama was eating packs of wild dogs.  Guess which one is a five page Washington Post cover story?

Hey, now…didn’t Journolist’s founder work for the Washington Post?  Come to think of it, he still works for the Washington Post!

This screenshot from Memeorandum is the textbook definition of “I got the memo”:

Message received loud and clear.

After Obama’s Epic Fail on same-sex marriage, we have to change the subject to a half century old nontroversy that the bankrupt Washington Post has been keeping its powder dry on for who knows how long.

What’s a bigger story?  An alleged prank from 1965 or Obama’s cocaine use in the last twenty years?  A dog put in a kennel on top of a car or the President eating it?

Why can’t we know what classes Obama took in college?  Why can’t we know his GPA?  How is teenage Mitt Romney somehow fodder for major news outlets but Obama starting his career in the home of a domestic terrorist and spending 20 years in a racist crackpot’s church off-limits?

Old Media, just go out of business already.  The Emperor isn’t wearing any clothes and his only modesty is you covering up his pride with your mouth.

Sh*t My Newscaster Never Says

Sh*t you will never see on the news
Night after night I patiently wait for one of these stories to be covered in my nightly infotainment.

  • Good Money After Bad – The Education Crisis: Why does throwing billions more not lead to noticeable improvement?
  • Is Black Racism, like that espoused the likes by Al Sharpton, just as bad as regular old racism?
  • Our Generous Soul: A three part look at the incredible works done by people of faith.
  • Teacher’s Unions; do they always act in the best interests of our students?
  • Mitt Romney; why a business approach to our nation’s problems might be a good idea.
  • Illegal immigration; the difference between nativism and a common sense approach to immigration.
  • Academic Greed: Why more government aid causes tuitions to skyrocket.
  • Nation of NIMBYs; a shocking and possibly disturbing look at the strong arm tactics and endless lawsuits of the Sierra Club.
  • Corporations: Legal entities that people put together to conduct business and create employment.
  • Are We Creating a Nation of Slackers? A shocking and possibly disturbing look at questionable majors in our institutes of higher learning.
  • Eminent Domain: Tonight we interview a poor minority family ousted from their home by the government.
  • Abortion: Two sides of the debate.
  • Shameless Extravagance: Meet The Other Fat Cats of Rodeo Boulevard.

Gawd, I could go on…

Stay Classy, Progs

So, in today’s leftist media culture, you’re not allowed to call a slut a slut, but you’re free to mock tornado victims as “greasy spots” on the highway getting smashed by their “God”. Thank goodness there’s no double-standard in the media or these loving leftists might get really nasty one day.

It’s hard not to wish ill upon a sick, diseased soul such as this, but I shall try to refrain. (or at least I’ll refrain from typing it)

UPDATE: Apparently this guy gets off on trying to make a name for himself via making “shocking” statements. Here he is celebrating Andrew Breitbart’s death. I guess this is how the talentless try to get attention.

For Whom The Bag Douches (It Douches For Thee)

Were that these berzerker hobos lying-in-wait “islands to themselves”.  Diminishing the 99% with each douche-tastic display.

Needless to say, when you’ve lost a white, vinegary Leftist like Bill Maher – your baggeth runneth over (sausage link to Noel Sheppard at the invaluable NewsBusters):

‘Baggin’ It

BILL MAHER: Let me ask you about another occupation, because this is – and you would be good on this too, panel -, the occupation, the Occupy Wall Street, because similar to Afghanistan, when you occupy anything for too long people do get pissed off. And as I watch them on the news now I find myself almost agreeing with Newt Gingrich. Like, you know what – get a job. Only because, you know, the people who originally started, I think they went home and now it’s just these anarchist stragglers. And this is the problem when you, you know, when your movement involves sleeping over in the park. You wind up attracting the people who were sleeping over in the park anyway.

Please adjust your nozzles accordingly.  That comment may come as a shock to any CBS watching diaper defiler, NPR latte enema-ed poser, or MSNBC kool-aid jello-shooter.

With your feeble attempts to play PR Ernie Pyles for Obama’s Army of unwashed Overcredentialed Under-educateds. Or your futile, shirt-wrenching efforts to plant victory gardens in the barren earth of these buy-now, pay-never Anarchists for greater state control.  The only thing that stood in the way of tilling such a fertile narrative was the immovable stone of Subject and the Content.

Were that we able to douche you out to sea with them.

Weekly Idiocracy Roundtable: The Grand Bargain That Never Existed Has Electrolytes Edition

Newsbusters captured an entertaining exchange between Charles “Not Sure” Krauthammer and President Camacho’s sycophantic press corps in the People’s Republic of Lemmingrad.  The similarities are facepalmslappingly uncanny.

Grab some Brawndo and enjoy:

CHARLES KRAUTHAMMER: [The President] talks a good game. “Oh, I’m prepared to do entitlements, I’m ready to do entitlements.” Not once has he ever enunciated in public – other than all these leaks which I don’t trust for half a second – one structural change in entitlements, and without that, everybody over the age of nine knows we are not going to get a handle on the debt. So let’s hear him say it in public once.

NINA TOTENBERG, NPR: So why is it when he offered the big deal, the $4 trillion deal…

GORDON PETERSON, HOST: The grand bargain. It’s got electrolytes.

TOTENBERG: …the grand bargain (It’s got electrolytes), Republicans backed away from it?  It’s got what Republicans crave.

KRAUTHAMMER: When did he offer that?

TOTENBERG: He offered that last week.  What Republicans crave!


TOTENBERG: In, he did it, publicly and in negotiations.

KRAUTHAMMER: In your leaks? What’s in the $4 trillion?

TOTENBERG: But Charles.

KRAUTHAMMER: Give me a number. Explain to me what’s in it.

TOTENBERG: Why is it, in two, in matter of two days, Republicans backed away from that and said we don’t want it?  It’s got what Republicans crave.  It’s got electrolytes!

KRAUTHAMMER: You accept everything he says, a $4 trillion deal, if you don’t have a single item in it that you can enunciate.

TOTENBERG: Well, I’m not at the table. Perhaps you are, but I’m not.

RAUTHAMMER: Well then how does he expect America to accept something in which he explains nothing?

TOTENBERG:    But he’s giving Republicans what they crave.  He actually said I’m going to get heat from my own people.

KRAUTHAMMER: My colleagues are demonstrating a point I’ve been trying to make about how you have a completely compliant, pliant, supine press accepting every leak out of the White House. Tell me, we have been told, I’ve heard it again and again that the President’s prepared to do, to make cuts in entitlements. Name me one.

These are the allegedly smart, well-informed Washington insider media.  Which one can escape the lure of the mystery box???  Entitlement reform might save Social Security, but the mystery box could be anything!

At this point President Camacho, aka Captain Awesome, flicked everyone the bird and acknowledged that everyone’s shit is real sensitive right now but that he has a plan to make the crops grow again.  Crops which we can then slap out of a starving child’s mouth so that we can put it into a car’s gas tank which will ultimately ruin it’s engine.   A very complicated plan that requires a measly additional $2,000,000,000,000.00 to make it through the next year or he’s going to be forced to shoot grandma in the face, stab our troops in the back and layoff all the food inspectors.

No cuts to a non-existent high speed rail to Iowa City is still untouchable though.  Still got a billion to give to Hamas.

Let them eat Extra Big Ass Fries.  No, wait.  You can’t have Extra Big Ass Fries.  Only I and my fugly wife can have Extra Big Ass Fries. F*ck you, I’m eating.

You can have Peas.  They actually do have electrolytes.

The Old Man And The C (I.A. Prison)

Whither thou, young Hemingway.  The world’s smallest sitar plays for you.

Father of the Year, Frank Lindh, still doing a bang-up job.

Proud Papa Frank Lindh, whose diseased loin sprang forth the American Taliban, has a full page op-ed in the New York Times today lamenting why his son has not been similarly sprung from the womb of a federal penitentiary upon Osama Bin Laden’s premature evacuation of this living world.  As Mr. Lindh is an attorney, he is so highly learned that he cannot distinguish the crimes of Osama bin Laden from those of his son.

So, upon the death of bin Laden, his son should be free as a bird.  Right?

Like Ernest Hemingway during the Spanish Civil War, John had volunteered for the army of a foreign government battling an insurgency. He thought he could help protect Afghan civilians against brutal attacks by the Northern Alliance warlords seeking to overthrow the Taliban government. His decision was rash and blindly idealistic, but not sinister or traitorous. He was 20 years old.

We’ll linger on the “20 year old” part in a moment.  But like Hemingway, the younger Lindh joined those idealistic Taliban in fighting off those Nazi Afghan warlords and to inure those poor, Afghan civilians’ throats to the loving strangle of the Taliban.  If ever there was a moment to mind you’re own effing business, this Old Man in the CIA prison never took advantage.

Before 9/11, the Bush administration was not hostile to the Taliban; barely four months before the attacks it gave $43 million in humanitarian aid to Afghanistan. There was nothing treasonous in John’s volunteering for the Afghan Army in the spring of 2001. He had no involvement with terrorism.

Just this last week, one of our nation’s eternal embarrassments – Jimmy Carter – called us “human rights violators” for not giving aid to North Korea despite their repeated violations of sanctions.  Does us providing humanitarian aid to North Korea, or Iraq under Saddam Hussein or any shithole in the world carry the import of our endorsement of the regime in power?  This is more than disingenuous.  It is, in fact, a damnable lie that the Bush administration gave its blessing to the Taliban so that Failure Frank can lay down his own suppressing fire for Jihad Johnny.  The Times editors know this and chose to keep it.

If this is the new standard then we should immediately cease and desist all humanitarian aid to every country whose leader is not as pure as the driven snow.

I was stunned when I learned that John had gone to Afghanistan. It wasn’t our fight; he put himself in harm’s way without his parents’ approval. He did not go into Afghanistan alone; he took his family with him, and we all have suffered for his impulsive choice.

Does a 20 year old need permission from their parents anymore to do anything?  I realize Mr. Lindh says he is an attorney so I’ll trust him on that.  Hopefully, he’s also aware that the same laws provide Taliban Johnny with the free choice to make his own decisions also mean that we don’t get to prosecute him as the father since Young John’s defects clearly lie with the manufacturer.  And shouldn’t he bear some civil and financial responsibility for putting out this defective product without a warning label that ended up killing others?

Now that Bin Laden is dead, I hope President Obama, and the American people, can find it in their hearts to release John, and let him come home. Ten years is enough.

Ten years for his running guns for the Taliban and staying silent when being questioned by the CIA Agents who were murdered in the riot he could have alerted them about is not long enough.  He deserves to be shot at dawn every morning.

Look deep into my heart.   No.

This month a two tour Iraq War veteran was shot 60 times in his own home by his own government while your piece of shit is kept safe from harm at US taxpayer expense to continue practicing the diseased religion that threatened the life of the former.  If ever we were able to trade the two.

Mike Spann is still unavailable for comment. Though I’d hope the Times could find the balls to let his father respond in a full-page OpEd.  We already know the answer to that one though.

Just like we know the entire transcript of the conversation between Spann and Lindh shortly before the riot that he could have alerted them to.  He sided in silence in favor of the Taliban after September 11th.  He should have been executed on the spot.

You Can’t Rape The Willing

This lover’s spat between the San Francisco Chronicle and Obama is getting out of hand.  In Tennessee, at least one party has to be arrested if the police arrive to a domestic violence call and see evidence of physical injury.  It’s the law.

However, it’s doubtful that Eric Holder is going to be flashing his blue lights or that Janet Incompetano will ride to the rescue in her extra-husky black wranglers for this collar.

The White House says a San Francisco Chronicle reporter broke the rules when she put down her pen and picked up a video camera to film a protest. The newspaper says the Obama administration needs to join the 21st century.

The conflict hit the newspaper’s front page Friday with a story about coverage of the protest during President Barack Obama’s speech last week at a private fundraiser.

It highlights the perils that arise when traditional arrangements between news organizations and politicians meet the modern reality that anyone with a smartphone can become a video journalist.

“Modern Day Reality” means a camera?  What is this – 1885?

That “traditional arrangement” would be to protect the comfortable in exchange for access.  Like Eason Jordan of CNN covering up Saddam Hussein’s atrocities to keep his Baghdad bureau open, every other media outlet in the U.S. has reached a similar arrangement for Barack Hussein so that they can keep snapping their pictures of his head in front of the presidential seal so that it resembles a halo.  And to photoshop out the horns as agreed.

I thought when you wanted to Change America ™ that “traditional arrangements” went out the window.  What was supposed to be an open marriage has not-so-suddenly become an abusive relationship.  Buck up, sugar.  He’s still such a catch.

Dan Gillmor, a media critic and head of the Knight Center for Digital Media Entrepreneurship at Arizona State University, said the White House needs to update the rules for its pool reports to match the realities of 21stcentury reporting.

But he also said newspapers should do more to embrace the new reality that amateurs are capable of providing their own records of events, showing a wider range of perspectives. For example, he said the Chronicle could focus more on providing a platform for amateur video, which would expand the definition of the press pool to anyone with a video camera.

In a Syrian sense, Obama’s the Reformer (like Assad) and this is really the SF Chronicle’s fault anyway.  Just look at how they were dressed all with a tape recorder and flip camera.  If you’re a reporter, you know not to go out in public all dolled up like that.

Put some ice on it, honey.   After all, no one in the media went into journalism to be objective.

The entire news media has a black eye today and they totally earned it.

Al Qaeda’s Poll Tax Disenfranchises Local Jihadi

Tennessee took a step towards cleaner elections this week with the passage of a Voter ID bill that burdens those citizens exercising their franchise with the same requirements as those to buy cigarettes and alcohol.  In other words, a “backdoor poll tax” as demagogued by local white trash House Democratic Caucus Chairman Mike Turner.

Poll Taxes, it seems, are breaking out all over in the mid-state.  Take the plight of this at-risk youth:

NASHVILLE, Tenn.A former TSU student on trial for murder in Arkansas said he killed a man in East Nashville in 2006.

Abdulhakim Muhammad is accused of killing one Army soldier and wounding another outside a military recruiting station in 2009. He’s now confessed to shooting a Nashville man as part of a “Jihad Operation.”

The father of Carlos Bledsoe believes his son became an extremist Muslim during his time in Nashville.

Muhammad did travel to Yemen after attending Tennessee State University. He said he is a member of Al-Qaeda, but detectives haven’t found any proof of that claim.

In other words, Defendant Muhammad’s undocumented membership in Al Qaeda has denied him Allah’s glory by our racist police department.  The failure of both Al Qaeda and the state of Tennessee to preserve Mr. Muhammad’s civil rights and to allow him to express himself fully because of his minority status calls back to the days of Jim Crow, Bull Connor, firehoses and german shepherds.  Selma ™ even.

Of course, Mr. Muhammad was in no way radicalized by Nashville’s peace palace the Al-Farooq Islamic Center whose annual Hate Crime Hoax performance art has entertained and educated the city through their self-deprecating DIY vandalism. The Al-Farooq Peace Palace has also posted a strongly worded rebuke to Mr. Muhammad’s black father of “malicious, xenophobic allegations”.

Al-Farooq Islamic Center would like to take this opportunity to refute strongly the malicious, xenophobic allegation purpoted against our center during the congressional hearing addressing homegrown islamic terrorism. As many of you might have heard, a certain mr. Melvin Bledsoe, have accused our center of teaching radicalism to our kids. These allegations are not only baseless, but they are also absurd and contrary to what Al-Farooq Islamic Center stands for.

Well that settles that.  When a 19 year old converts to Islam and wins an all expenses paid trip to a terrorist training camp in Yemen and returns to murder a US soldier at a recruiting facility then  it was obviously underwritten by his summer lawn mowing business and at the urging of those no-goodniks at the Elks Lodge.

I hope the Nashville City Paper, the Nashville Scene and The Nashville Post (ed: I repeat myself) will run cover story after cover story to bring attention to the plight of our state’s under-documented Islamic jihadi enthusiasts.

If they don’t get free government issued IDs so that we can identify the real ones from the pretenders then those really dangerous Nazi, KKK Republicans have already won or something.


Also Charles Maldonado’s Fault

Go home, union lackey:

Hammered by the automobile industry’s decline, Detroit’s population plummeted 25 percent over the past decade amid an economic downturn so severe that Michigan was the only state that failed to gain residents, according to 2010 Census data released Tuesday.

Detroit is the town that unions built and then destroyed.  If you think they’re such a great idea, then go back to where you came from and make it work.



Newsweek Is A Filthy, Naughty Linkwhore

Liberals are universally too clever by half. Particularly those at Newsweak.

After being sold for a dollar to a Far Left California Congresswoman, they’re taking The Nashville City Paper route and insulting their readership in an attempt to gain advertisers.  Is that how Old Media papers used to work when they were successful?  This week’s cover story:

How Dumb Are We?

NEWSWEEK gave 1,000 Americans the U.S. Citizenship Test–38 percent failed. The country’s future is imperiled by our ignorance.

Like all liberal attempts to fingerpoint, there are four more fingers pointing back at themselves.

Exit question:  If people are so stupid, how is this not the teacher’s union fault?  They’re the ones who failed to educate them about US history after all.  Did they miss that class in between Gender Studies and Ecology?

Correction: This is all Charles Maldonado’s wife’s fault.

Here’s Your Hat, What’s Your Hurry?

Worth Every Penny: Even at the low, low cost of FREE no one is reading your agitprop and we'd love to see those Enron accounting circulation numbers.

In case no one has seen a City Paper rack recently, the decline in readership is proportional to it’s Nashville Scene-ification.  To wit, today’s COVER STORY is a 3,000+ word liberal broadside by a freelancing, freeloading Michigander transplant who mooches off his Nashville teacher wife in support of Unions:

Here’s the thing: I believe in unions. I’m not supposed to say that for a number of good reasons. But I think I might be over that now, being free to say the following.

The anti-union legislation now making its way toward passage in our state legislature is not only mean-spirited and unnecessary, but it’s the worst kind of shallow, cynical politics that this shallow, cynical country can produce.

Not shallow and cynical enough for us to turn away all of your illegal aliens, eh Chuckles?

For those J-School grads out there, this is what a resignation looks like.  Charles Maldonado is no longer a credible source for any reporting, freelance or otherwise, and should be summarily dismissed from ever filing for The Nashville City Paper again.  But we know that won’t happen because some editor looked at his 3,000+ word hate screed and thought “Let’s put this on the cover!”

It gets better.

I do not for one second believe that Republicans in the state legislature believe their rhetoric about teachers’ unions. In saying that I’m being generous to them, because if they did believe it, they’d be as gullible and incapable of critical thinking as they present themselves to be. Consider that for a second now, and then again after you finish reading how virtually every bit of factual information in this “debate” over unions has been distorted by officeholders currently waging a political war.

I’m a reporter. I can’t even say any of the above aloud under normal circumstances, let alone write it for publication, but there it is. I’d offer my letter of resignation, but I’m a freelancer, and I can’t resign from my non-job.

Is that final sentence the crux of this bird-flipping to red state Tennessee?  The ball-less Nashville City Paper / Scene staff don’t have the guts to sign the editorial themselves so they farm it to an out-of-state freelancer to provide cover for their cowardice?

I’m also from Michigan, and that means I grew up believing that the labor movement is either directly or indirectly responsible for many good things, not just greed, graft, corruption, political manipulation, and the widescale theft of billions from public treasuries.

That one confused me.  Is he acknowledging Union greed, graft, corruption, political manipulation and widescale theft of public treasuries or is he projecting that onto Republicans?

I think we can all agree that Tennessee would do well to emulate Detroit’s policies and all the good Unions have done for them.

Among them: the 40-hour work week; workplace safety regulations; whistleblower protection; some measure of dignity for people who work for a living; and more or less creating the American middle class. But then again, I was brainwashed. I’m sure if I were from Tennessee, I would know that Davy Crockett did most of that.

So if you don’t subscribe to Chuckle’s pro-union view then you’re a backwater hick who thinks Davey Crockett invented OSHA.  Fuck you, seriously.

Toot-toot-toot.  Unionists belt out “40 Hour Work Week” like it was their only number one hit from 1899 and they’ll play it until Dick Clark quits inviting them on Bandstand.

The last and best reason for me to believe in unions is that my wife, Jenny, who is by far the breadwinner in our home — somehow managing to outshine the $7,159 I pulled in last year by a factor of, let’s say, a lot — is herself a Metro Nashville Public Schools teacher, and thus, the current target of choice for the state GOP’s campaign of folksy divisiveness and arbitrary, albeit maybe focus-grouped, derision. (Or at least she’s one of a select few that includes women, non-Christians — especially Muslims and to a slightly lesser degree seculars — poor people, sick people, children unless they’re not born yet, the whole LGBT spectrum, all immigrants except the ones from business-y countries, and anyone uncomfortable with the idea of being armed all of the time. I think that covers the big ones.)

The last and best reason – unions personally enrich me!

Oh, and if you don’t support giving this jackoff who moved from Michigan to Tennessee because it was so great there then you also hate the poor, the sick, Muslims, atheists, the almighty chirren, gays, spics, wops, dagos, trannies, handicapped wheelchair ramps, free internet access, Black History Month, low-fat margarine, climate change and NPR.  Did we forget anyone?

This is the cover story of a once somewhat respectable DAILY paper now reduced to being the Monday and Thursday version of the Nashville Scene.

A loss of bargaining rights will leave Jenny with nothing between her and lower wages, a reasonable pension and health care contribution, and undoubtedly, wide-scale layoffs at some point.

She’ll still has you, Romeo.  Sitting at home on your ass.  Pulling down $7k large on your populist soapbox being paid to pretend to be a reporter.  I believe it was the famous Beatle Keith Moon who said, “all you need is love”.

Wide scale layoffs from the government hasn’t happened in Obama’s Depression.  Layoffs are what people in the private sector feel.

“You have no idea what it’s like to get in the car, every day, to and from work, and listen to people in the news trashing your profession,” Jenny said.

Of course not.  No one could.  Unless they happened to work for a bank, an energy company, Wal-Mart, an insurance company, a Japanese auto manufacturer who employs Americans, the US Chamber of Commerce, and any other private sector company during Obama’s Two Minutes Hate against non-government business.

It rambles on and on and on and on and on everything from Tennessee unionists not being in-your-face enough like those successful Michigan ones to wild accusations about CCA (the private prison company) running it’s own Fight Club.  You broke Rule #1, Chucky!

The Closer:

The Wrong side has always been composed of living people who likely don’t realize, in the moment, that their actions and beliefs would one day be judged as bankrupt. At one time you could have asked some of them, ordinary mortal humans like Joe McCarthy or George Wallace, how it feels to have your life worked over like that, your ordinary mortal human actions retold over and over again as the bad guy part in a morality play for so many consecutive years. It would have to be a kind of living hell, made all the worse by the fact that it was the hell nearly everyone thought they deserved.

We’ve already been judged as bankrupt.  Literally.  Our country is bankrupt.  Not morally.  Financially.  Not bending over for unions does not mean people supported George Wallace turning firehoses on black people, you delusional asshole.  Although Joe McCarthy would have a field day with all of the certified Communists in the Labor movement.

There goes Separation of Church and State out the window again.  We live in “Hells we think we deserve” but Heaven is available if you want the government to provide it for you.

Just ask for forgiveness on bended knee before your secular god.  Your handout will runneth over.

I’ll keep my closer short:

You take to the pages of a once respectable paper ruined by your deadbeat bosses to insult Tennesseans as racist hillbillies who think Davey Crockett invented the light bulb.

This is how you ask for people to support your position.  Then again, it’s really not.  You know you’ve lost so you’re setting fire to the oil wells with the help of your cowardly editors hiding under the skirt of your tenuous employment relationship that was their responsibility.

Go back to Michigan, asshole, and take your moron wife with you where you will be appreciated.

And for the Scene Editors, if you gave a shit about Charles Maldonado you could have given him a full-time job and offered him healthcare coverage.  Would that have cut into Jeff Woods’ skull simonizing budget or Jim Ridley’s Analese allowance?  Judging by the current staff, evidently he’s not white enough.

You gave a Facebook rant cover story to a guy who’s welfare is your responsibility.  Gutless, blame shifting cowards.  This was the editorial equivalent of a suicide bombing of your own paper’s last couple of readers.